by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com
Train up a child…
Helping Children Set Goals for School
If we don’t know where we are going, how do we know when we get there? Children and adults alike need to know what they are aiming toward. As we help our children get ready for school, we need to include a time to sit down with each child individually and help that child set realistic goals for the coming school year.
Goals should be predicated on what is best for the child. There should be both short-term and long-term goals. Goals should lead to mastery of needed material for the success of the child.
It is all too easy for a parent to impose goals on a child to accomplish what the parent wants for the child rather than what the child really needs. All adults have dreams and aspirations for their children and these same dreams and aspirations can cause us to set goals for a child to accomplish what we want, not taking into consideration the child’s real abilities. Good goals will take into consideration the problems a child has had and the vision of what that child can realistically accomplish. To expect all children to be “A” students is not being realistic. Even if a child is smart enough to be an “A” student, that child may get a teacher whose personality does not “click” with the child, the child may have times when s/he may not feel well, or a child may have a mental block or lack of background experience to provide a needed foundation for understanding of what is being taught. In fact, grades should not be the priority of goals. Grades should be taken out of the picture and effort should be emphasized. If a child is developing good study habits and doing the best possible, that is the important thing.
Enough short-term goals should be set to encourage a child along the way. One short-term goal might be to spend a certain length of time each school night for a week doing homework. When that goal is reached, another short-term goal of perhaps a month of a certain amount of time spent on homework could be set. The child or parent may decide on an award for the accomplishment of each goal. The emphasis should be placed on spending time learning the material. Even if a child says that the work is done, sitting there for a certain length of time will provide time for reflection on what is learned as well as thoughts of application of the material learned. To finish a paper or two does not mean that a child has learned the needed facts. It is wonderful when a child learns the pleasantness of learning! Learning opens new worlds that many children never discover in their eagerness to “get it over with”. A long-term goal is to see that the child experiences the joy of learning.
Some schools have done away with grades of A, B, C, D, and F. They are experimenting with promoting children by levels. When a child can test out of a certain level, that child moves to the next level. There are many examples of students who have made high grades who don’t know the material and vice versa. Just to “finish homework” doesn’t meet the need of the child. Parents, as well as teachers, need to make sure that the child knows the material. Goals should be set to accomplish mastery of material assigned.
Each child is unique and one set of goals does not fit all. As parents take the time to sit down with the child and discuss needs and goals, it would be well to listen to the child first. Most children will be honest and surprisingly know what they need to do if given a chance. It is the parent’s role to provide guidance and encouragement.