One might wonder if everyone has given up on teaching children good manners. In most casual conversations, it is common to hear, “Oh, that’s the way kids are nowadays!” This is usually said in a tone of resignation as though there is nothing that can be done about it. Not true!
Children can be taught good manners if we work at it and refuse to accept the status quo of behavior. We must not permit bad manners. We need to set an example of using good manners. We need to condemn the use of bad manners in society.
Are we too tired to take the trouble to correct children? Do we give up and think it is hopeless to teach children when seemingly everyone around is using bad manners? Most of us would agree that better manners are needed not only by children, but good manners are needed by adults in today’s society as well.
The basis of all good manners is kindness and consideration of others. At any point where we see a child being inconsiderate of another person, that child should be stopped. Questions stimulate thinking. A good question to ask such a child is, “How would you feel if someone did or said that to you?” Most children will not think about the feelings of others unless they are taught to do so by such questions. Also, children should be required to apologize when they have been inconsiderate of others. Some children who may continue to hurt others should be turned over a parent’s knee and given a good hard spanking. Since teachers are not allowed to do as much discipline as in past days, it is left up to the parents to do the spanking. We must be consistent in our expectations and punishment. If we tell a child not to do something, we should not let the child get by with doing it even one time. Every time a child is allowed to get by with something he/she has been told not to do, that child thinks that the adult did not mean what was said and continues the action.
It is not surprising that so many children seem to have bad manners considering the example that they constantly see in adults around them. We are living in a society that seems to have forgotten about good manners. In our homes, we get so busy that good manners are pushed aside to hurry and get something done. Adults often interrupt when others are talking. On TV the sitcoms seem to try to outdo each other in the amount of rudeness that is portrayed to bring laughs. Our politicians do not set a good example in conversation. Protestors often demonstrate more bad manners than they demonstrate the need for a cause. We need to set an example at home and in society of kindness and consideration of others.
It would be nice if all children could quickly recite the golden rule. “Do to others as you would have others do to you” is certainly a wonderful rule to live by. Perhaps we should post it in every home and classroom and require the children to recite it often. Not until we take action will children develop good manners, but they can learn to behave in pleasing ways.