Tag Archives: Raising children

Time to Plan the Summer for the Kids!

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child…

Time to Plan the Summer with the Kids

         It has been said that those who fail to plan are actually planning to fail.  Now that the school year is almost at a close, it would be wise to sit down with the children and plan out the summer.  Summer provides an opportunity to spend more time with the children and teach them things that are not taught at school.  Goals need to be set for improvement of needed areas in the spiritual, mental, physical, and social realms.  The more the children are involved in the setting of these goals and plans, the more apt they will be to adhere to them.

         Setting goals involves a certain amount of self-evaluation.  Children need to be asked to be honest in talking about where they think they can improve in each of the four areas mentioned.  An easy way to do this is to use four strips of paper marked off in inches with one inch being the lowest and 10 inches being the highest. Use one strip to represent each of these four areas: social, mental, physical, spiritual.  Ask the child to tear off the strips to show where they think they are in the development in each area; then, place the strips together as if to form a square.  If the child is equally developed, there will be a perfect square.  More likely, however, some strips will be shorter than others.  The short strips show where the child should improve.  Activities for the summer should be chosen to improve the child in the areas needed.  

         As parents spend more time with children during the summer, vacation and play activities can be planned as needed.  Most children need more physical activity.  Should this be the case with your children, one goal might be to involve them in sports teams.  The whole family can have lots of fun as they take part in cheering, providing refreshments, etc. If the children need social development, plans can be made to have outings with families who have children approximately the same age to develop friendship and social manners.  There are many good activities provided by churches such as Vacation Bible School, summer camps, or other get-togethers to provide Spiritual growth.  The selection of trips to educational sites greatly helps children academically.  

         Schools have little or no time to teach children about the care of the home.  Parents need to make sure that children have chores to do around the house and that they are taught how to do them properly.  There are many minor repairs that can be done at home to save money and children need to be taught how to do them.  Cleanliness of the home, cooking, mending of clothes, proper care of appliances and furniture, and lawn care need to be learned while children have time to practice things taught. Many teenage girls love to paint and redecorate a room during the summer.  Many teenage boys love to work on an old car or piece of machinery.  Many teenagers will obtain their first job outside the home, but they will probably still have time to do other things mentioned.

         The summer will go by all too fast.  When fall comes, many will be saying, “Where did the summer go?”  Plan now to use the summer wisely with children before it is gone.

Plan a Meaningful Easter

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come: Children, Come to Me; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; When the Stars Fall Down; My Thinking Book; Love is….) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child…

Plan a Meaningful Easter

         Easter is arguably the most important holiday of the year.  Without Easter, Christmas would lose its importance.  For this reason, we should make great effort to impress upon children the relevance of this holiday.

         It is always good to create pleasant memories for children.  It is investment in their future to do so.  At the same time, we must make sure that children understand the true meaning of this special time.  

         Many would like to do away with the commercialism associated with Easter.  Realistically, that will probably never happen.  Our best option, it would seem, is to use the commercialism to teach children while they still enjoy the fun provided by longtime traditions.  Egg hunts are fun and children would most likely resent not being allowed to take part in them. If we can tell the children that the eggs represent new life as provided by Christ’s death on the cross and that we are promised in the Bible that if we seek that new life we will find it; then, they can learn truth while having fun.  Easter baskets can be explained as coming from those who love them and want to show that love.  Since God gave his son as a gift, we like to give gifts to our children. If new clothes are purchased at this time, again we can tell the children that a life is just like new once a person believes in Christ, repents, and invites the Holy Spirit to live within us.  Most children are too intelligent to actually believe in an Easter bunny.  It is best to tell the children that the Easter bunny is simply part of a game that is played at this time of year.

         There is no better time than Easter to take the family to church and teach children John 3:16. Every child should know this verse that says, “For God so loved the world that He gave his only son that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life”.  Many churches have special services at Easter. Some churches have a solemn service on Good Friday. Some churches will have a sunrise service.  When children get up early for this event, they are forced to realize that this time is special.  

         Let’s put special effort into making sure children remember this Easter.  Let’s have fun with the children and at the same time teach them the real meaning of the holiday.  Many religions worship an individual, but the Christian religion is the only one that worships a risen Savior.  This event provides hope for each of us in a life after death.  Knowing this gives children purpose and meaning to life.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

Dealing With Attentiveness

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble; and www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Dealing With Attentiveness

Train up a child…

Dealing with Attentiveness

         I don’t claim to be an expert on Attention Deficit Disorder, but sixty-two years of teaching experience should count for something.  When I first started teaching, a child was given a spanking for not paying attention in class.  Now, a child is often given medication for the same problem.  Many people feel that the medication is over-prescribed.  It becomes a real quandary for parents to know what to do when they are told that their child has ADD.  In making decisions about such a child, it would be well to check to see if the child is consistent in not paying attention, check the environment of the child, and make sure the child is not getting caffeine or too much sugar and getting proper nutrition.

         During my 20 plus years teaching GED classes, I have often had students tell me that they have been in special education classes and have been diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder.  When I worked with them, I found they were far behind where they should have been at the time they dropped out of school. I believe that a few of them truly had a physical problem affecting their ability to focus on their work.  However, most seemed able to focus when they chose to do so.  In one case, a student told me he had ADD.  When I asked him what he really liked to do, he told me that he was a cook at a restaurant and liked to work on cars.  “Do you have a hard time paying attention to cooking and working on cars?” I asked.  “No”, he said, “that’s something I like to do”.  If a person can pay attention at some times, but not other times, it is a pretty good indication that medication is not needed.

         Our education system has taken on an attitude of classroom management that is often very distracting to any student.  Many classrooms are far too noisy for children to concentrate.  In my orientation of new students for GED, I often hear a loud sigh of relief when I tell them that I don’t allow anyone to waste time and steal time from other students by being disruptive in the class.  I have been surprised by responses to the question on their enrollment paper that asks, “How can the teacher best help you to learn?”  Many new students have written that they would like a quiet room with a good learning environment. Several students have told how their classrooms were often too noisy when they were in school.

         Children should not be allowed to have caffeine at all.  Most soda has caffeine, and many children are allowed to drink that soda.  Sugar can cause a child to have a rush of energy that is hard to control.  Proper nutrition plays an important role in a child’s ability to concentrate.

         It is amazing to me, that when children are diagnosed with ADD, that acceptable means of dealing with it are not addressed.  Even if medication is required in a few cases, parents and teachers should continue to address the causes and make accommodations for dealing with the problem.  Until the problem is taken care of, teens and adults who have been diagnosed with ADD should not be behind the steering wheel of a car.  If they can’t pay attention in school, why do we think they can pay attention while driving a vehicle?  

         For the most part, we need to understand that treating the symptom does not correct the cause. There can be no harm done in checking a child’s nutrition and making sure s/he does not have too much caffeine or sugar.  Rather than simply giving in to the idea that a child can’t pay attention, we need to decide if the child simply won’t pay attention. It would be nice if we could get into a child’s mind and see clearly what is going on there.  Since we can’t, we simply must use our best wisdom and understanding to provide the help needed.

Children and Learning Disabilities

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble. www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Children and Learning Disabilities

Train up a child…

Children and Learning Disabilities

       We hear a great deal about children who have learning disabilities.  There are children who have been diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder, Attention Deficit Behavior Disorder, Dyslexia, and recently I heard of an instance where children were being diagnosed with obedience disorder.  One has to wonder about the authenticity of many of these diagnoses. 

         With the wide use of drugs and alcohol during recent years, we have to consider the possibility that many babies have been born carrying the effects of the usage of these substances by their parents.  No doubt, there has been some effect upon the ability of those children to cope with life. On the other hand, one can’t help but wonder if many children are labeled with the terms mentioned simply because those working with the children can come up with no way to deal with the needs the children have. In addition to the effects of substance abuse, children are also affected by nutrition and inherent interests.

         I had occasion several years ago to visit a neonatal ward in a hospital that specialized in babies born with problems.  It was horrible to watch little babies, so small you could hold them in your hand, shiver and shake with withdrawal symptoms from drugs because their mothers had used drugs while carrying them. When my husband and I worked on the Navajo reservation, we learned that some parents would put alcohol in the baby bottles on the weekend to put them out while they had a good time.  Now, I know of homes where children are constantly with cigarette smoke and they are getting the effects of the secondhand smoke.  This affects their health and possibly they have withdrawal symptoms needing “a smoke” during school hours.  Research shows that a large percentage of retardation is caused by mothers using alcohol while they were pregnant. There is much evidence to indicate that substances affect a child’s behavior and learning ability.

         When I was teaching GED classes,  I had a student enroll in my GED class who told me that he drank two 2-liter bottles of Mountain Dew and smoked two packs of cigarettes each day.  He couldn’t understand why he was having a difficult time sitting in class and concentrating on studying!  Although this sounds extreme, it is not an isolated incident. Caffeine is not a good thing for children and too much caffeine and sugar is not good for adults.  (Four grams of sugar equals one teaspoon.  One large Mountain Dew has about 23 teaspoons of sugar.) Many adults allow children to drink a great deal of soda with caffeine, give them large amounts of sugar, and do not watch the diets of their children.  What a child consumes certainly affects learning and behavior.         

         When God created us, He didn’t create us with the idea in mind that all were to fit in a mold of behavior expected by the educational personnel in today’s schools.  I’m not sure that our ideas of how children are to respond to our teaching are how God intended all children to respond. Children are born with dominance in three or four intelligences. Children who have the “body” intelligence will naturally find it more difficult to sit quietly and pay attention in school.

         There is probably no person alive who does not have some difficulty at some time or another in learning something.  We have to find ways to work with ourselves to cope with the difficulties we have in order to learn what we need to survive.  As parents and teachers, we need to help children learn to cope with their challenges.  Unfortunately, labeling a child with a disability name often enables a child to feel excused for lack of accomplishment.  Children grow up thinking they can’t do some things and they simply stop trying. We need to use common sense in working with children when they have challenges to learning. 

Who’s Right? or What’s Right?

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is….) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Who’s Right or What’s Right?

Train up a child…

Who’s Right?  Or What’s Right?

         It is very easy for parents and children to get into power struggles, and each try to prove that s/he is right.  It is a challenge to parents to avoid these struggles and work with children as a partner to determine what is right.  It requires putting one’s own ego aside, using diligence in the choice of words, and knowing the right thing toward which to work.

         We often make the mistake as parents in thinking that because we won the immediate battle that we have won the war.  This is far from the truth.  Not only does winning a battle fail to guarantee future acceptable behavior in a child, but it often creates resentment and a feeling of “I’ll prove I’m right.” No one likes to have to “give in” and children are no exception. When required to do so, children often harbor resentment. On the other hand, if parent and child can reason together and come up with solutions, those solutions tend to stick, and the child has learned how to deal with the same problem in the future.  It is too bad that many parents let their egos stand in the way and won’t listen to a child’s reasoning. If parents can be patient and humble themselves and admit that they may not have all the answers, children tend to respect them more and are inclined to discuss problems in a reasonable manner.  Parents often think that respect is gained by demanding it.  The truth is that respect is gained when the parent is patient and kind and willing to listen to a child.

         If a parent is willing to admit that they are wrong, the child will respect them more.  The child feels good about self for having convinced the parent, and the parent will wait until a future time to have the upper hand.  No one likes to be told that s/he is wrong all the time.  There are times when the child is right, and we adults are wrong.  Parents may be afraid they will lose respect, but the truth is that more respect will be gained, and the child will feel freer to discuss things with parents if they feel the parents will listen to them.  

         When a child is small, parents have the right to demand proper behavior, and throughout the teen years there will be times when reasoning does not work.  For the safety and well-being of the child, the parent may need to insist on having their own way.  Whenever possible, however, reasoning with a child is a better way to teach. Demanding certain behavior works for only a short time.  We need to subdue our thirst for control to the level that will allow us to reason with children to teach truths to last for a lifetime.  It is not important to know who is right, but it is very, very important for a child to know what is right.

A Real Necessity

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; When the Stars Fall Down; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon; Barnes & Noble; www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child…

A Real Necessity

         There is one thing that is so very important for the success of a child in school and life.  Without this, a child will be stuck on approximately the third-grade level in math and not continue to progress. That child will be unable to manage money when s/he becomes an adult although the desire may be there to do so.

         What is that one thing?  A child must know the multiplication tables!

         It seems like such a “no-brainer” to say that children should learn their multiplication tables. However, during the 20+ years of teaching GED classes, I observed over and over that this vital part of the education of my students had not been fulfilled.  I have had students from at least ten different school systems including out of state, and the story is the same.  I have had nearly 1000 students enroll in the classes I have taught and probably 90% of them did not know their multiplication tables.  Many of these students were on college level in reading indicating that the ability to learn was certainly there.

         What accounts for the fact that the multiplication tables have not been learned?  In my opinion, there are several reasons (or perhaps excuses).  Parents often leave this kind of thing up to the teachers.  The teachers are pressured to cover a certain amount of material in large classes where individual attention is not possible.  Modern math, several years ago, promoted the philosophy that if a student understood math, drill was not necessary.  Our trend for fast food and fast learning tends to cause a child to expect learning to be easy. Attitudes of “somebody owes me something,” and “I am not responsible for myself,” cause a child to believe that s/he can get by without knowing the multiplication tables.  Social promotion has fostered that idea further by letting the child know that s/he will go on to the next grade whether or not all the material has been mastered.  

         What kind of logic says that if a child can’t do third grade work, that child can do fourth grade work?  Students grow up thinking they are dumb and just can’t “get it” simply because they have not been required to “get it”.  Some students go year after year in school, getting in deeper and deeper water and feeling more and more frustrated because they can’t handle the math that requires knowing the multiplication tables.

         In school, the multiplication tables are usually introduced at the end of second grade.  In real life, we can begin working with children when they are toddlers to help them understand some number concepts.

         When playing with small children, we can simply provide information by saying such things as, “Oh, I see two blue blocks here and two more blue blocks there.  That makes four blocks.  Two times two is four.”  We need to constantly include such comments in conversation to help children become aware of numbers.

         A great deal of math can be taught with a bag of M & M’s or a bag of jellybeans.  They can be sorted into groups and counted to see how many groups of different numbers and colors can be made. When they have succeeded in learning some of the facts, they can be rewarded by allowing them to eat the candy.

         We need to require older children to write the multiplication tables over and over.  The more senses we use in learning, the faster we learn.  By writing, the child is using touch and sight.  If the child says them aloud while writing, that child is also using hearing. 

         Spanking a child to learn is not appropriate, although it may be appropriate to spank a child to get that child to take time to do homework and try to learn.  Drill is appropriate.  There are many ways and opportunities to help the children with this vital information.  All the thousands of dollars and all the new programs for education do very little good with math if a child does not know these basic facts. 

         Parents, grandparents, and teachers, it is so very important to make sure that your third and fourth graders learn their multiplication tables! 

Children and Santa

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way, My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon.com; Barnes & Noble; www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child

Children and Santa

       For a long time, Santa has been our society’s focal point of Christmas.  He, no doubt, has sold many million dollars worth of toys.  He has produced much laughter.  He has caused the eyes of children to light up.  In reality, he has been the only reason many people observe Christmas.

         What is the current status of Santa?  Our computer-literate generation of children is not easily fooled.  In truth, how many of us grown-ups ever really believed in Santa?  Some children were fooled simply because they believed that their parents would never lie to them.  Others believed because they thought that by believing, they might get more gifts. Many of us could easily see the impossibility of someone flying around the whole world in one night and stopping at each house and going down each chimney.  We felt that it was insulting our intelligence to expect us to believe such a far-out story.  

         Today, we have many fat Santas at malls, department stores, parades, etc.  Do we really think that our children are not intelligent enough to figure out that they are too big to fit in a chimney?  Even a toddler can question why there are so many Santas.  

         A bigger question involves the feelings of a child who truly believes in Santa because he trusts his parents to never lie, and then finds out that the parents did, indeed, lie to him/her.  What happens, then, when the parents tell the child about an invisible Jesus?  For that matter, can the child believe the parents at any time if they deceived them with a Santa?  

         Our children cannot be shielded from Santa.  Our society sees to it that Santa is visible over and over.  It is a situation we must deal with.  We don’t want to rob our children of the fun of Christmas, but, at the same time, we don’t want our children to lose trust in us. A parent cannot avoid making a decision as to how to handle Santa.

         One idea for parents is to tell the children that to pretend there is a Santa is a fun game that is played at Christmastime.  Just as children play pretend in other areas, parents play pretend with the child about Santa. When little girls play pretend “mommy” with dolls, or little boys may play pretend” soldier with army toys, they do not really think they are grown.  It is alright to play pretend as long as children can come back to reality. This stimulates creativity. By letting the children know up front that Santa is a pretend game, future disappointment is eliminated.  It would be a good idea to explain that Santa represents giving and making others happy.  That is something that Jesus wants us to do. 

         Santa will probably be around for a long time to come, but deceiving children should end. We should never lie to children!   

         It is important that we create a pleasing experience for children at Christmas without leaving them with the feeling at a later time that they have been deceived.  Different personalities handle this in different ways.  Ultimately, whatever means is used, children should be left with understamding the real meaning of Christmas.  Children need to understand that Christmas is a celebration of the time that God sent his only son into the world to show His love for us.  

Choosing Gifts for Children

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child

Choosing Gifts for Children

            When our children were young, there were some Christmas days that my husband and I would look at each other in bewilderment as we watched our children open their presents, set them aside, and start playing with the cardboard boxes they came in! We had put much time and effort into selecting what we thought was just the right gift, yet they enjoyed the boxes more than what they had contained. It is easy to spend a good deal of money and time and still not come up with the right gift. 

         We all like to see children have fun and be happy on Christmas morning.  It is a temptation to overspend to make sure that the children will not be disappointed.  Sometimes we buy a gift, and then not feeling sure we chose the right gift, we go and buy another gift.  Where does it stop?

         It is great to give a gift that the kids really like and have fun with.  It is even greater if they can have fun and learn something valuable at the same time.

         Money spent on educational toys is money well invested.  It is unfortunate that there are also toys on the market that have little or no learning value and break easily.  Those toys are a waste of money.  Some last only a few minutes.  We, as parents and grandparents, need to use wisdom in deciding whether the toy asked for by a child is really the best purchase.  I have never been excited over Disney creations.  They may be alright but what do they really teach?  I see very little, if any, learning value in them.  Barbie dolls may actually have a negative effect on children.  After all, what kind of goals do we want our children to have?  I was glad when our daughter decided that she did not want to encourage our granddaughter to get excited about Barbie dolls.  Someone gave our granddaughter a Barbie book when she was small.  I was astonished when I read it to her and found what the book was about. Barbie was sad because she wasn’t going to get to model in a show until another model broke her leg, and she got the job after all.  Are we teaching our children to profit by the misfortune of others?

         We need to consider, also, that many toys are made overseas.  We may want to wash or sterilize some before the children play with them.  They may be made in factories that are not sanitary and come on ships a long way.  Someone told me that they worked one Christmas season unpacking toys that came from overseas and a big blue bug flew out of a box.  Everyone was sent out of the room while it was fumigated.  The children who got those toys not only got toys that had had bugs on them, but had also been sprayed with insect killer.  

         Let us keep our emotions under control and carefully think through the selection of gifts for our children.  

It Really is the Thought that Counts

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble; wwwpatlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child…

It Really is the Thought that Counts

         A lot of joking takes place at Christmas and birthdays when gifts don’t seem to match up with the recipients.  There are those who think that if you spend a lot of money, the gift should be appreciated. Some folks like handmade gifts; others think it is a sign that the giver has more time than money.  Some people fret and fret and still cannot come up with a gift that they feel comfortable in giving to someone. Then, thankfully, there are those who just seem to have a knack for gift-giving and always seem to come up with just the perfect gift.  

         I wonder if the secret to knowing the perfect gift for someone is knowing someone perfectly well.  The better we know someone, the better we know their likes and dislikes.  When we wait until the last minute and feel that we simply must find a gift, usually neither the giver nor the recipient enjoys the choice. In fact, there are those wonderful, efficient people who are alert to appropriate Christmas gifts all year long, picking up things they know someone would like when they happen to see them or making things ahead of time for those they love.

         I’m glad there are still those folks who enjoy handmade gifts.  They are getting scarce as time to make them becomes more and more limited.  I’ve always felt that someone must care for another very much to go to all the trouble to make something. Counted cross stitch, embroidery work, handmade pieces of furniture, crocheted or knitted work, and other handmade items are priceless.  

         In the movie, “Christmas in Canaan”, on the Hallmark channel a unique idea was given.  I had never heard the idea that was presented there.  The father wrapped up pictures from catalogs of items he wished he had money to buy for the family members.  In the story plot, the crops had been bad, and money was scarce.  The family remembered that special Christmas in the years to come and treasured the love shown by a father who truly wished he could do more.  The story was another reminder that Christmas is love, not things.

         It is so very noble when people ask that gifts not be given to them, but rather the money for those gifts be used to meet the needs of others. There are needy families who can really use some help.  On the other hand, there are those folks who have so much that it is hard to think of anything they don’t already have to give to them.  It is amusing to look through some catalogs and see some of the unusual creations that are there to lure people to spend money.  

         When we give to others from the heart, it is like giving to Jesus.  After all, it really is his birthday, not ours.  We need to teach our children to give from the heart by setting the right example for them.  Children need to understand that we give to others to show our love for them.  Emphasis needs to be put on what would make the other person happy.  We can help children avoid selfishness when we teach them that gifts should be given with a great deal of thought and love.  

Christmas Memories

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by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is….) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child

Christmas Memories

         Memories of childhood greatly influence decisions of adults.  That is why it is so important for parents and grandparents to make every effort to ensure good experiences for children that will create a good foundation for adulthood.  Christmas is a perfect time for doing so.

         Memories don’t necessarily have to be fun memories.  How a family works together in tough times is a memory that provides direction for a person in adulthood when that person faces difficult times.  Valuable memories do not necessarily require money.  How gifts are given from the heart at Christmas teaches a child that gifts should be given in love and do not necessarily need to be expensive.

         Those of us who lived during the years of the Great Depression are not as alarmed about the state of the nation’s economy because our memories teach us that we can survive well without many of the things we have come to enjoy.  I’m sure that many others remember, as I do, having a cedar tree cut from the woods for a Christmas tree.  Our tree was often decorated with red and green construction paper chains made in school by cutting strips and pasting the ends together in circles.  We would interlock the red in green, then the green in red, etc.  We made snowflakes by folding white paper and cutting it in various designs.  We would hang the snowflakes on the branches of the tree.  Sometimes, we would make strands of cranberries to drape around the tree.  We always felt important for contributing to the decorations.  

         A few years ago, our youngest son and his wife moved from Kentucky to Arkansas just before Christmas.  We spent Christmas with them sitting among unpacked boxes.  All Christmas decorations were packed away.  On Christmas Eve, we looked at each other and I could tell that our son was feeling a little apologetic for the situation.  I thought hard about what could be done.  I found a pen, reached in a box, pulled out some packing paper, and said, “We each have to make our own stocking.”  We found some scissors, designed our stockings, and laid them on the hearth of the fireplace.  I felt good when I heard our son chuckle.  A memory had been created.

         When my husband and I were working on the Navajo Reservation at Lukachukai, AZ, we had a big snow storm one Christmas.  The mail came only three times a week and during the storm, it could not get through at all. No gifts from our homes came in time for Christmas. We had already given each other our gifts thinking there would be more from our homes in MO and NE to open at Christmas.  On Christmas morning, we sat looking at each other and a bare tree.  That is a memory we will never forget, but it made us appreciate each other more.

         We can be very creative in making memories for children.  Sometimes it is a good thing to be short of money.  It causes us to be more resourceful.  We spoil our own Christmas when we place too much emphasis on “things”.  We should never forget that people are more important than things.  The real basis of the Christmas season is love.  When couples argue over how much money to spend, unpleasant memories are created for their children.  We should not be stingy, but we should never buy beyond our means.  We need to learn to make good use of what we have.  By doing so, we create good memories for children and set a good example for them.