by Pat Lamb (Author of : Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…)

Sometimes Dads “Got No Respect”

Train up a child…

       It is too bad that sometimes dad does not have the respect he should have in his family.  I’m sure he feels like Rodney Dangerfield at times when he would say, “I got no respect!”  No matter what kind of dad he is, dad deserves a certain amount of respect simply because he is dad.  However, there are many things he can do to make respecting him easier for all with whom he comes in contact.  Following is a list of suggestions:

• Dad, say what you mean and mean what you say.  When you tell a child to do something and then don’t follow through to see that it is done, the child thinks you will forget it the next time and he/she can get by without obeying.
• Don’t make promises you may not be able to keep.  Learn to say, “I will try to do ______” instead of “I will do ______”.
• Show respect to the children and their mom.  You will get respect in return.
• Be kind and gentle to mom.  The kids are watching how you treat her.  If you mistreat her, they think they can mistreat her also.  They love their mom and will resent anyone hurting her.  They will respect you for being patient with her and treating her nicely.
• Speak kindly of neighbors and acquaintances.  
• Honor your debts.  Pay bills quickly and try not to be indebted to others.
• Discipline the children out of love and concern, not anger.  They know the difference.  When you discipline with anger, it is because you are thinking of how you have been inconvenienced, not what is best for the child.
• Spend time with the children and take interest in their activities at school and church.
• Be quick to say “I’m sorry” when you have done wrong. False pride causes us to think we will be disrespected if we admit weakness, but actually the opposite is true.  
• Be honest in all business dealings.  The kids are watching.
• “Take the bull by the horns” and be the spiritual head of your household.  Make sure the family goes to church.
• Remember birthdays.  Do whatever it takes to help you remember even if it means putting notes on the bathroom mirror.
• Practice what you preach.  “Do as I say and not as I do” doesn’t work.

         How often do we hear, “Kids show no respect anymore”?  One of the reasons some children do not respect parents and other adults is that we do not do the things necessary to earn that respect.  We can each improve in this area.