Tag Archives: Father’s Day

A Lesson from a Dad

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child…

A Lesson from a Dad

       No matter how old we get, when Father’s Day comes, our thoughts naturally turn to our dads and what they mean to us.   My dad taught me a lesson that I would like to share with you.

         We had about 24 cows to milk most of the time on our little farm in Verona, MO.  I liked to tag along with my dad on summer evenings when he went down into the pasture to bring them up for milking.  On one hot summer evening, I was tagging along behind him watching the little puffs of dust come from under my bare feet on the dry, dusty cow path. Suddenly he stopped, squatted down, and pulled a blade of grass.

         My dad sat for a while looking at that blade of grass.  First he looked on the underneath side of it, and then he rolled it over and looked at the top of it.  I could tell that my dad was having deep, serious thoughts.

         “Patsy,” he said, “jest look at this blade of grass.  Look at all the little hairs on it.  Look at all the little lines going here and there on it.”  About that time, an airplane flew overhead.  My dad looked up at the sky and said, “You know, man can make an airplane and fly.  Why, someday, who knows, man may even be able to go to the moon and back, but don’t you ever forget that only God can make a blade of grass!”

         I haven’t forgotten that lesson. Sure enough, man has gone to the moon and back, and man has done much more. Man has even learned to clone animals and humans, but man will never be able to make a blade of grass.  

         Some of the best teaching parents can do comes at opportune moments when least expected.  Impromptu teaching of values can only come if a parent’s heart is right and the desire to teach is there.  Just as we walk every day and never give a thought to the grass we are treading upon, so do we often let day after day go by and never give a thought to the many opportunities for teaching children.

         The best planned lessons from the most educated of teachers may not be as effective as a lesson given from the heart of a dad.  Sure, mom has plenty of input, but there is something extra special when a dad puts his effort into working with his children.  A dad should think of the home as his piece of the world.  It is his to govern and support.  It is something he owns in partnership with mom.  Mom is his helper as he rules his “little country”. 

         Whether or not a dad wants this responsibility, it is his, and God will hold him accountable for how he conducts himself with this assignment.  In God’s sight, just because a man left a home, his responsibilities have not been erased. Bringing children into the world places the responsibility of rearing them squarely on the dads.  Nothing can take that away. 

         This Father’s Day, let us be grateful and express that gratefulness to our dads.  There are many fine dads who take their responsibilities very seriously and they deserve to be honored.  Oh, that there were more dads who do so! 

Dad’s Dilemma

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book; Love is…) Books are available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com.

Train up a child…

Dad’s Dilemma

         Dad has a dilemma as he attempts to be head of his home.  That dilemma is how to please mom and, at the same time, “bring home the bacon” and train the kids properly.

         I’m afraid that too many of us as mothers may be too critical of dad and his attempts to discipline and teach the children.  Often, we expect dad to see things just exactly as we see them and do just exactly as we would when they make an effort to direct the children.  If God had intended us both to think the same, he would have made us both the same.  Often dad wields a firmer hand than a mother would.  I believe that is the way it should be.  It seems to be the nature of mom to nurture and cuddle.  Too many times we want to jump in and rescue a child when dad knows that firmness is needed.  Dad doesn’t want to disappoint mom.  This puts him in a tough spot.

         One comedian in Branson joked that a woman’s brain has a four lane highway going from the left brain to the right brain and men have a narrow cow path going from one side of the brain to the other.  This makes women more able to multi-task where men are more apt to think of one thing at a time.  Generally, this is true. 

 Of course, there are exceptions to all of the research findings.  Some men can multi-task.  For those men who find multi-tasking difficult, it is really hard to come home from work and immediately switch to the role of being a dad.  I remember reading in the 50’s that the wife should wait until the husband has been home from work 20 minutes before she starts telling him about the day with the kids!  Times have certainly changed as now many women are also working outside the home.  However, a man may still find it more difficult to adjust quickly to a different set of tasks from what he faced at work.  Also, many jobs now require the person to be on call for 24 hours. In this case, it is especially difficult to switch the mind back and forth to concentrate on what the children need.

         Many dads hesitate to discipline the children for fear they are not doing it properly.  They want the children to like them, and may fear that they only see him when he is scolding them for something and will hold it against him.  The truth is that even though children may resent discipline for a time, in the long run there will be more respect for parents when they show that they care enough to risk not being liked for the sake of a child.  As for not being sure of how to discipline and teach properly, dads need to avail themselves of books and other information available to help them learn. 

Dr. James Dobson has written many wonderful books that give insight into how children think and react.  Dads need to visit the school and meet the teachers and get involved with their children’s activities. Also, dad needs to make sure there is a time each week for the family to have devotions and an opportunity for each family member to express any concerns or ask questions. 

         We can all learn and do better when it comes to bringing up children.  Mom needs to be more patient with dad and dad needs to make more effort to learn about children and communicate with the family.

Dads Have Trying Times

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book: Love is…) Books are available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and www.patlambchristianauthor.com

Train up a child…

Dads have Trying Times

         Dads who are serious about raising good children will have trials from “cradle to grave”.  Here is one example of a trial our youngest son, Charles, experienced on Mother’s Day.

         Trying to be a good dad, Charles had taken his seven-yr.-old son, Garrett, to buy a present for his mom.  On Mother’s Day, he and Garrett got up early and happily got the gift, took it out of the box, and put it on the porch.  It was a storage unit for the lawn chair cushions.  Mom would really like this!  Garrett excitedly called for his mom to come and see her surprise.

         Garrett’s mom, Kelly, was hurrying around as usual and didn’t want to spoil the occasion by waiting until she could check the younger brother,  23-month old Spencer.  “I couldn’t have been away from him more than ten minutes,” she said.  I didn’t want to spoil the moment, but I kept thinking, “It’s too quiet upstairs.”  She excused herself as quickly as possible and ran upstairs to check on Spencer.  Spencer, who had not been invited to the fun time, had created some fun of his own.  She found him sitting in the bathroom floor splashing in water and having a great time!

         Spencer had been flushing one thing after another down the toilet.  Water was everywhere!  It had even run down into the master bedroom closet and ruined the sheetrock on the walls!  The rest of the day was spent trying to snake out the water line and clean up the mess.  A Dixie cup was found, and a toothbrush was never found.  Finally, it was decided that the toilet would have to be replaced.  A trip was made to town to buy a new toilet.  The new toilet was installed and the sheetrock was removed from the closet walls.  

         I couldn’t resist asking Charles, “Did you get mad at him?”  I was relieved to hear the answer, “Naw.  He’s just too little to understand what he did.”  

         Charles had worked 72 hours the week before at his job.  He had looked forward to a pleasant weekend at home.  This event was certainly a trial of his love for family, and I am happy to say that he came through just fine! I suggested that he would probably have many more such trials before the boys become adults and he assured me that he knew this to be true.

         Although this trial seems bad enough, truth is that as the children grow older, the kinds of trials may change to be heart-rending trials, not just trials that require physical stamina. 

         Hats off to all the dads this Father’s Day, who are surviving or have survived trials of many sorts, because of their love for their children.  May they reflect the love of our Heavenly Father in their daily lives as they are constantly being observed.

Son’s prayer:  Dear God, Make me just like my daddy.

Dad’s prayer:  Dear God, Make me the man my son thinks I am.  

Dad’s Dilemma

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Dad’s Dilemma

         Dad has a dilemma as he attempts to be head of his home.  That dilemma is how to please mom and, at the same time, “bring home the bacon” and train the kids properly.

         I’m afraid that too many of us as mothers may be too critical of dad and his attempts to discipline and teach the children.  Often, we expect dad to see things just exactly as we see them and do just exactly as we would when they make an effort to direct the children.  If God had intended us both to think the same, he would have made us both the same.  Often dad wields a firmer hand than a mother would.  I believe that is the way it should be.  It seems to be the nature of mom to nurture and cuddle.  Too many times we want to jump in and rescue a child when dad knows that firmness is needed.  Dad doesn’t want to disappoint mom.  This puts him in a tough spot.

         One comedian in Branson joked that a woman’s brain has a four lane highway going from the left brain to the right brain and men have a narrow cow path going from one side of the brain to the other.  This makes women more able to multi-task where men are more apt to think of one thing at a time.  Generally, this is true. 

 Of course, there are exceptions to all of the research findings.  Some men can multi-task.  For those men who find multi-tasking difficult, it is really hard to come home from work and immediately switch to the role of being a dad.  I remember reading in the 50’s that the wife should wait until the husband has been home from work 20 minutes before she starts telling him about the day with the kids!  Times have certainly changed as now many women are also working outside the home.  However, a man may still find it more difficult to adjust quickly to a different set of tasks from what he faced at work.  Also, many jobs now require the person to be on call for 24 hours. In this case, it is especially difficult to switch the mind back and forth to concentrate on what the children need.

         Many dads hesitate to discipline the children for fear they are not doing it properly.  They want the children to like them, and may fear that they only see him when he is scolding them for something, and will hold it against him.  The truth is that even though children may resent discipline for a time, in the long run there will be more respect for parents when they show that they care enough to risk not being liked for the sake of a child.  As for not being sure of how to discipline and teach properly, dads need to avail themselves of books and other information available to help them learn. 

Dr. James Dobson has written many wonderful books that give insight into how children think and react.  Dads need to visit the school and meet the teachers and get involved with their children’s activities. Also, dad needs to make sure there is a time each week for the family to have devotions and an opportunity for each family member to express any concerns or ask questions. 

         We can all learn and do better when it comes to bringing up the children.  Mom needs to be more patient with dad and dad needs to make more effort to learn about children and communicate with the family.

A Lesson from a Dad

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com )

Train up a child…

A Lesson from a Dad

       No matter how old we get, when Father’s Day comes, our thoughts naturally turn to our dads and what they mean to us.   My dad taught me a lesson that I would like to share with you.

         We had about 24 cows to milk most of the time on our little farm in Verona, MO.  I liked to tag along with my dad on summer evenings when he went down into the pasture to bring them up for milking.  On one hot summer evening, I was tagging along behind him watching the little puffs of dust come from under my bare feet on the dry, dusty cow path. Suddenly he stopped, squatted down, and pulled a blade of grass.

         My dad sat for a while looking at that blade of grass.  First he looked on the underneath side of it, and then he rolled it over and looked at the top of it.  I could tell that my dad was having deep, serious thoughts.

         “Patsy,” he said, “jest look at this blade of grass.  Look at all the little hairs on it.  Look at all the little lines going here and there on it.”  About that time, an airplane flew overhead.  My dad looked up at the sky and said, “You know, man can make an airplane and fly.  Why, someday, who knows, man may even be able to go to the moon and back, but don’t you ever forget that only God can make a blade of grass!”

         I haven’t forgotten that lesson. Sure enough, man has gone to the moon and back, and man has done much more. Man has even learned to clone animals and humans, but man will never be able to make a blade of grass.  

         Some of the best teaching parents can do comes at opportune moments when least expected.  Impromptu teaching of values can only come if a parent’s heart is right and the desire to teach is there.  Just as we walk every day and never give a thought to the grass we are treading upon, so do we often let day after day go by and never give a thought to the many opportunities for teaching children.

         The best planned lessons from the most educated of teachers may not be as effective as a lesson given from the heart of a dad.  Sure, mom has plenty of input, but there is something extra special when a dad puts his effort into working with his children.  A dad should think of the home as his piece of the world.  It is his to govern and support.  It is something he owns in partnership with mom.  Mom is his helper as he rules his “little country”. 

         Whether or not a dad wants this responsibility, it is his, and God will hold him accountable for how he conducts himself with this assignment.  In God’s sight, just because a man left a home, his responsibilities have not been erased. Bringing children into the world places the responsibility of rearing them squarely on the dads.  Nothing can take that away. 

         This Father’s Day, let us be grateful and express that gratefulness to our dads.  There are many fine dads who take their responsibilities very seriously and they deserve to be honored.  Oh, that there were more dads who did so! 

Sometimes Dad’s “Got No Respect”

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Sometimes Dad’s “Got No Respect”!

       It is too bad that sometimes dad does not have the respect he should have in his family.  I’m sure he feels like Rodney Dangerfield at times when he would say, “I got no respect!”  No matter what kind of dad he is, dad deserves a certain amount of respect simply because he is dad.  However, there are many things he can do to make respecting him easier for all with whom he comes in contact.  Following is a list of suggestions:

  • Dad, say what you mean and mean what you say.  When you tell a child to do something and then don’t follow through to see that it is done, the child thinks you will forget it the next time and he/she can get by without obeying.
  • Don’t make promises you may not be able to keep.  Learn to say, “I will try to do ______” instead of “I will do ______”.
  • Show respect to the children and their mom.  You will get respect in return.
  • Be kind and gentle to mom.  The kids are watching how you treat her.  If you mistreat her, they think they can mistreat her also.  They love their mom and will resent anyone hurting her.  They will respect you for being patient with her and treating her nicely.
  • Speak kindly of neighbors and acquaintances.  
  • Honor your debts.  Pay bills quickly and try not to be indebted to others.
  • Discipline the children out of love and concern, not anger.  They know the difference.  When you discipline with anger, it is because you are thinking of how you have been inconvenienced, not what is best for the child.
  • Spend time with the children and take interest in their activities at school and church.
  • Be quick to say “I’m sorry” when you have done wrong. False pride causes us to think we will be disrespected if we admit weakness, but actually the opposite is true.  
  • Be honest in all business dealings.  The kids are watching.
  • “Take the bull by the horns” and be the spiritual head of your household.  Make sure the family goes to church.
  • Remember birthdays.  Do whatever it takes to help you remember even if it means putting notes on the bathroom mirror.
  • Practice what you preach.  “Do as I say and not as I do” doesn’t work.

         How often do we hear, “Kids show no respect anymore”?  One of the reasons some children do not respect parents and other adults is that we do not do the things necessary to earn that respect.  We can each improve in this area.

Dad Reflects God to Children

by Pat Lamb (Author of: Let the Children Come; Children, Come to Me; When the Stars Fall Down; Widening the Church Doors to Teach the Narrow Way; My Thinking Book. Available on Barnes & Noble, Amazon, www.patlambchristianauthor.com )

Train up a child…

Dad Reflects God to Children

         Everyone who believes in God has an image in mind of what He is like.  The mental image we have of our Heavenly Father is greatly determined by the image we have of our earthly father.  Children naturally associate the word “father”.  They reason that what one father is like, the other father is probably also like. 

         If children have a father who has left the family and is not meeting his responsibilities, they are likely to decide that God, the Heavenly Father, cannot be trusted.  If they have had trust placed in their dad betrayed, why should they believe that any other father can be trusted?

         Children may have an earthly father who has not left the family physically, but who does not meet his responsibilities in the home.  This situation can have the same or similar effect of the father who has left the home.  They again see an individual who cannot be relied upon.

         If dads have unreasonable expectations of children and are too strict with them, children may develop an image of God as a stern taskmaster who will not love them if they make a mistake.  If they never seem to please their earthly dad, they may reason that they will never measure up to God’s expectations and simply give up without trying. They may fear punishment from God to the extent that they want to avoid Him.

         When dad fails to express verbally his love for his children, they may not believe that God really loves them.  

         If dad is always “goofing off” and everything is fun and games to him, children may not develop a sense of seriousness about what the Heavenly Father expects from them.  Dismissing all actions of children and not holding them accountable for those actions may result in children feeling that God will let them get by with anything

         If dad doesn’t think it is important to study the Bible and go to church, the children will probably think that God is not important enough to spend time on and give attention to in worship.

         If, however, dad is a godly man who truly loves his children in a scriptural way, children will probably grow up realizing the importance of God in their lives and want to serve and worship Him.

What an awesome responsibility to be a dad!  Truly, children not only walk in dad’s footsteps, but they form their lifelong beliefs by dad’s behavior.  If we adults truly examine our image of God, we will probably find that at least part of it is similar to our earthly father.  Fortunately, Bible study can correct much of the negative views of God as we read about God’s true characteristics.  The sad truth is that when children have been raised with wrong attitudes, they may never seek the truth and may never learn the difference in order to form a correct image of God.  

There is no doubt that dad sets the tone of the home.  He is designed to be the head of the home and whether or not he consciously accepts that designation, there are results of his behavior that cannot be avoided.  It is not a matter of do as I say and not as I do in raising children. Good examples produce good outcomes. Bad examples produce unwanted outcomes.  Our children are with us for such a short time in the whole scheme of our lives.  While they are young, we need to be willing to give up personal pleasures and do all we can to obtain the tools we need to raise our children with a realistic image of God.     

Dad’s Dilemma

by Pat Lamb (www.patlambchristianauthor.com)

Train up a child…

Dad’s Dilemma

         Dad has a dilemma as he attempts to be head of his home.  That dilemma is how to please mom and, at the same time, “bring home the bacon” and train the kids properly.

         I’m afraid that too many of us as mothers may be too critical of dad and his attempts to discipline and teach the children.  Often, we expect dad to see things just exactly as we see them and do just exactly as we would when they make an effort to direct the children.  If God had intended us both to think the same, he would have made us both the same.  Often dad wields a firmer hand than a mother would.  I believe that is the way it should be.  It seems to be the nature of mom to nurture and cuddle.  Too many times we want to jump in and rescue a child when dad knows that firmness is needed.  Dad doesn’t want to disappoint mom.  This puts him in a tough spot.

         One comedian in Branson joked that a woman’s brain has a four lane highway going from the left brain to the right brain and men have a narrow cow path going from one side of the brain to the other.  This makes women more able to multi-task where men are more apt to think of one thing at a time.  Generally, this is true.  Of course, there are exceptions to all of the research findings.  Some men can multi-task.  For those men who find multi-tasking difficult, it is really hard to come home from work and immediately switch to the role of being a dad.  I remember reading in the 50’s that the wife should wait until the husband has been home from work 20 minutes before she starts telling him about the day with the kids!  Times have certainly changed as now many women are also working outside the home.  However, a man may still find it more difficult to adjust quickly to a different set of tasks from what he faced at work.  Also, many jobs now require the person to be on call for 24 hours. In this case, it is especially difficult to switch the mind back and forth to concentrate on what the children need.

         Many dads hesitate to discipline the children for fear they are not doing it properly.  They want the children to like them, and may fear that they only see him when he is scolding them for something, and will hold it against him.  The truth is that even though children may resent discipline for a time, in the long run there will be more respect for parents when they show that they care enough to risk not being liked for the sake of a child.  As for not being sure of how to discipline and teach properly, dads need to avail themselves of books and other information available to help them learn. 

Dr. James Dobson has written many wonderful books that give insight into how children think and react.  Dads need to visit the school and meet the teachers and get involved with their children’s activities. Also, dad needs to make sure there is a time each week for the family to have devotions and an opportunity for each family member to express any concerns or ask questions. 

         We can all learn and do better when it comes to bringing up the children.  Mom needs to be more patient with dad and dad needs to make more effort to learn about children and communicate with the family.

Note: Summer vacation is a perfect time to train children to do daily Bible readings. “My Thinking Book” is a daily devotional book designed for children to read for self or have read to them. Each day’s devotional is based on Scripture. Available at www.patlambchristianauthor.com, Amazon, or Barnes & Noble.

One Daddy

Train up a child…

One Daddy

My dad grew up in Eagle Rock, MO. He had a scant eighth grade education because he could only go to school when the weather was too bad to work in the field. Working in the field often meant plowing behind a team of mules. When he did go to school, the kids made fun of his bare feet by spitting on them.
Daddy’s mom died in 1926, when daddy was twenty-three years old. By that time, my dad had married my mom and they took his younger brothers to raise. Daddy worked on the railroad in Monett, Mo, for a time. He bought a piece of land outside Verona, MO, and built a house, barn, and chicken house on it. Later, he built a garage and milk house of field rock. He raised hogs and milked cows to sell the milk. He grew corn and alfalfa in fields plowed with a team of horses. He kept the farm, bought another piece of land and began farming it. He had fields of strawberries and took the strawberries on the old red truck to Monett, MO, where they were shipped out on a train.
My dad bought a building in Verona and opened a grocery store while still farming. He built a house on the back of the building and we lived in town for a time. I remember standing in front of that building, (it is still there), and watching a truck come into town, the back open up, and a man ladling soup into bowls and cups held by people lined up behind the truck.
When I was in seventh grade, my dad decided to go to church. His dad was a Pentecostal preacher, but my dad had been too busy raising five girls to think about church. Now, although still very busy, he became active in church. He taught a Sunday School class for more than twenty years. The little church bought him a chair in his old age because he couldn’t stand up long enough to teach. When he prayed, it was like he burst a hole in the ceiling with his introductory, “Almighty God”! He had a booming voice and there was no doubt as to the head of the household. My mom often reminded us of that with her, “You kids just wait ’til your daddy gets home! He’ll take care of you!” And he often did. He helped us each plant a peach tree and when we got a whipping, it was from a branch of the tree we planted.
My dad would often kneel by an old stump on the farm and his voice could be heard far away pleading to God to save his children and grandchildren. It is heartening to see how so many of those prayers have been answered.
Daddy didn’t believe in going in debt. He never bought a vehicle until he could take a load of calves or pigs to the stockyards in Springfield to get money to pay cash. He did, however, occasionally borrow a small amount. His reputation was so good that I think any one of my sisters or I could have borrowed money from that bank with few questions asked. His financial secret…”Don’t spend money unless it will make money for you”.
Daddy loved poetry and once wrote a poem that was printed in a Springfield paper. He said, “Poetry and inventin’ jes go together”. He invented a contraption to help him track bees for his beehives. He invented chicken roosts for chickens to kill mites, and a machine to take kernels out of black walnuts. He grafted a black walnut tree with English walnut. One Christmas, my gift was a quart of nut kernels from the produce of that tree.
When Daddy died, at age 84, he had saved enough money to care for my mom until she died. Then there was enough that each of my sisters and I received some.
My dad was a man who did everything with purpose and intensity. He was respected as an honest, hard-working man. When I looked at my dad lying in his casket, I thought, “Daddy, the greatest thing you did for me was to give me the assurance of where you are now.” There was no doubt in my mind that my dad had gone to be with his Lord.